It’s just a date.

A date on the calendar is of no importance unless something important happens to us on that date. An event, decision, memory….tragedy. By having something happen to us the date begins to have meaning.

That date, well it’s not always beautiful or happy. It’s not always full of roses and sunshine! It’s not always something we WANT to remember. Sometimes, we just wish that date on the calendar would disappear.

In my world, February 28th is just a date. A very unhappy, sad, hate filled date.

6 years ago (wow, can’t believe that even as I type) my family and I lost someone who is VERY special. Loretta Jean Gaby. My Mema and my biggest prayer warrior.

To say that losing her was unexpected would be an understatement. It was something that was never on my mind. I know that people die but I never thought at 18 that I would have to experience her dying. I never thought on that date or even that year that I would watch my Mema’s heart stop. That I would have to drive home from the hospital knowing that things would never, ever be the same. And I was right, they haven’t been. That day changed everything about my life and in some ways I find that it is still changing me.  But things happen and I don’t think we are ever meant to understand why.

She was the BEST grandmother. I’m not being biased, it’s a fact. She was the best. She taught me how to make my first pie. She cooked for her family almost every single Sunday. She was at every event that I can remember having. She told me when I was being mean to my Momma. She took us to church when we stayed the night. She spoiled us. She taught us the meaning of family. She loved us.

I miss her so much. So, sooooo much. Every day. After six year it’s not easier and I still get angry about the entire situation and the fact that SHE is not here.

That’s why February 28th is just a date. Sure, it’s the date that I lost someone I love a lot but that feeling doesn’t just stick around for one date. So, it’s just a date.

 

March 6th. Well, that is not just any date. It’s a date I want to remember forever and a date that holds the birthday of my so-very-missed Mema. I’m beyond thankful for that date on the calendar. God allowed my Mema to be born. I am very blessed. I have truly come from the most beautiful, caring and loving line of women. To be like my Mema and my mom would be the biggest accomplishment of my life. It’s hard, I mean let’s be real. My mema was nice to everyone. Even if she really didn’t care much for them, that person would have never known it. My mom is the same way. I pray that one day I will be like that.

I miss my Mema. But I know she’s in Heaven living the best life and I will see her again!


Happy Birthday in Heaven, Mema!

Love,
        gaby 

(My Mema’s favorite song)

 

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